FBI

Back in April (it seems like an eon of Clinton ago!) FBI Director Robert Mueller gave a speech to the American Bar Association titled "Corporate Fraud and Public Corruption: Are We Becoming More Crooked?" The question was left open. Mueller wrapped up with a Teddy Roosevelt quote: "Character, in the long run, is the decisive factor in the life of an individual, and of nations alike."

Albany. The capital of New York. The heart of state government. Can't you feel the rhythm of the beat? Lub dub lub dub. Pols who make it there, don't need to go anywhere -- they can stay in Albany forever and ever and ever. The governor's mansion is akin to the hotel in "The Shining." After taking over, the new guy always goes barmy. He doesn't even have to live in it. Just throw an occasional reception.

Are you an American terrorist sympathizer but don't know how to strike back at the Great Satan? Afraid of getting arrested while your plot to blow up something or other is still half-baked? You don't have to worry anymore. Now, the Federal Bureau of Investigation and Central Intelligence Agency want to hire you.